My Blog

Time past really fast. In the blinking of an eye, new year 2009 is around the corner. With mixed feeling, i’m longing for the arrival of 2009. I wish that everything will be better in next year. I did enjoy my 2008 year as well. A lot of things did happen this year. I went through lot of obstacles and challenges. Thanks for those who gave me a helping hand.I’m really great and happy that you all are being around me. Sometimes i did feel that people will just judge the book by it’s cover, but because of you guys (gal and guy), it did make me feel that not everyone has the same attitude. Is the physical look that important? A person really need to dress up nicely so that only in this way she/he can give a good impression to others and others will treat you more nicely? With my pure and naive thinking, i totally don’t agree with this theory. But the realistic world make me change my mind. It’s kinda sorrow when i realise it. Anyway, luckily i’m still haven’t influnce by this realistic world yet. I will never judge the book by it;s cover. Really wish to get back to my pure heart and mind. =) This 2nd trimester is a super busy semester for me but i did enjoy it.DRRO Camp, tzu chi activities, japanese culture night preparation, porgramming assignment, birthday party with royale casino theme, a special wedding dinner , duty at bukit Antarabangsa landslide area, christmas celebration and etc. I wish everyone will have a happy new year 2009. I appreciate everything and everyone besides me very much.

Today after japanese class, i don’t really feel well (stomach pain) i really don’t have the mood to have my dinner and go to my meeting as well. But then i tell myself that i can’t skip the meeting as there are still lot of things haven been confirmed yet. Unexpectedly, i saw a smiling face in the sky once i reached campus It seem like wishing us that happy always. Don’t try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to. So for me, everything is depend on fate now ^_^ (friendship, relationship, career & chances in life).

It has been a long time i didn’t update my blog. I found out that i really don’t know how to express out my feelings;not even through speech but also through writing as well. What had happened with me? It’s so not like me.. Chan Sook Ching is no longer Chan Sook Ching anymore. I’m lost. Why? I start to  become quite realistic but at the same time i hate to be like that.I don’t dare to expect too much, don’t dare to care too much, don’t dare to trust other promise too much and etc.Is it because i just want to protect myself from being get hurt again? I always hesitate and hold back my words whenever i just wanna care for someone. I don’t really like this kind of feeling.   It’s time for me to really let it go. Let it  become a part of sweet memories in my life. We should happy because it happened, shouldn’t feel sad because it past.Ganbatte, sook ching move forward to your life. I wish the Sook Ching i know last time will be back again.. “A fragile heart with high determination will never give up easily”. Cheersss   I appreciate everything and everyone that besides me.. Trying to improve myself in order to search back myself..

I admit that my best friend play an important role in my life. They shared lot of feelings, experiences, fun with me in my life. I always believe friendship can be eternity. Maybe my point of view is misjudged. I always think of what kind of relationship between me and my best friend. I do believe they always care about me and wil be there for me no matter what had happened around me, no matter there is change in my life. But things seem like out of my expectation. Am i too sensitive? I feel in that way because i too care of my best friend. If there is a chance to be choosen again, i will be make a different choose. But i do appreciate everything i have now as i have already do my part. In order to maintain a friendship, effort from both side is really important. I just feel very sad and dissappoint with it. But what can i do for it? I can’t do anyhting. Just let it be.. Anyway, i do very appreciate the friendship between my best friend..

P/s:

*For yheng, thanks for the days you always care and share the feelings with me. *

For kean, i do hope our friendship will be eternity. Friends share their feelings right, don’t they? I hope nothing happen with it.

"I care and i love u all…."

In the blinking of the eyes, the arrival of the new year of 2007 is welcomed by all of us. What I had done for previous year 2006, I kept wondering in my mind. A lot of questions bombarded in my mind before. I realized that I had gained a lot throughout 2006 year which was a memorable and precious year for me. God had given me an angel that I will be appreciated eternally. Let us work hard and make a better one for this 2007 New Year. Effort on trying not to be cruel at others living creature, be considerate in others situations and troubles and improving ourselves are our revolution of 2007 in order to create a peace world. Remember the peaceful and wonderful land is the God’s gift to ours but not a place of suffering and wickedness like hell. Let put our hands together and try our best to change a better living life. Remind ourselves that in the eyes of the God we are priceless, thus please do appreciate everything that besides you especially your family and special ones. Love yourself, lover, family, friends, pets and the world!Spread out the love in your heart.

In a blinking of the eyes, it’s almost half year i moved to cyberjaya to continue my degree in BEng Electronics.. My life had changed lot.. I will be appreaciate everything that i do have now.. But i seem like quite emotional this few days, it might be because of the death of people around me. Life is totally extremely short. We really hard to predict what will be going on next moment in our life.. Mostly people are complaining about how meaningless and dull their life are, but do they think deeply about there are lot of unfortunates and disabled people in this world? Recently i had participated a camp organized by tzu chi. I had learned some of the principle of life that i never thought of before this.. Sometimes things will become more beautiful if we changed our attitude in our life.. The most beautiful thing in the world cannot be touched, heard and seen .. It feel within our heart….

What is the meaning of love? I still no idea with it. Maybe it’s a strong feelings which from our heart. I’m wondering if you don’t care a person , will there be anyone care for you? I know surely most of the parents will be care and love their child eternally. But i still have doubt on whether the relationship between siblings is that fragile and can be broken easily? I thought the bond between siblings can be very powerful but the fact that happened in my life told me that siblings is just seem like a stranger whom i always just stayed under one roof with them. I realised that i totally didn’t understand and not closed with them. Since i moved out from my home and further my studies in kl, the barrier between my siblings and me are getting wider and wider. I worried that the gap wil be undefined.. Is it i’m the one who cause this? i wonder!!

Time really flies.. It have been a month since i moved to cyberjaya to further my studies… everything is new for me over here. Enviroment, people, campus and studies are new to me. Before i moved to cyberjaya, i was longing to be here. But now feel like i miss melacca..life over here make me really stress.. My purple rage almost burst out like valcano.. I keep thinking of whether wan to change course or not but there are many reasons that make me feel like i can’t make such desicions.. What am i suppose to do? really hope there is angel guide me in my life…  Now i lost in the middle of road.. Anyway, i will not give up as if there is a will, there is a way… I can be considered as a lucky person as there are more unprivileged people in the world…. i should appreaciate my life now..

To friends, sorry that i will be seldom online, just send me an email if you guys are free.. I will reply you all as soon as possible..

To friend that i care a lot, although i didn’t send any message or call you, that really didn’t mean i forget about you. Just feel like don’t wan to disturb you. You are always in my mind. Thanks for your care.. Really appreciate it.. I wish you happy always and life will be greater..

Most of us think that life is too boring, dull and meaningless. Why we born to live in this world? What the meaning life? Do these kind of questions bombared in your mind? But when it come to death, we wish we will not die at that moment and wish to stay longer in this world. Does it sound weird? I do think so. I just lost a junior last nite, feel like life is too short for him . He just 17 years old. What he feel of at that moment? sighhh… =(

My life is become normal again after back from two days holiday from my hometown (Ipoh). Bombarded with questions and stress in head, busy studying as final exam is around the corner really make me feel very tiring.. Miss my family and friends very mush as it had been 3 months i didn’t go back to hometown.. These 2 days holiday really make me very exhilarated.. Finally i can meet everyone in hometown especially my family and my best friends.. Joyness and happiness filled my days in hometown… I’m wondering it’s a really happiest moment if all my best friends study in the same campus with me here. But the truth is impossible.. Without separation, there is no gathering.. Separation from from my family and best friends really make me doleful and mournful sometimes.. But because of separation, i learn to be much more appreciate the relationship with my family and the close friendship with my best friends.. Because of separation, we much more know to appreciate each others And miss each others.. is it right, kean yan? I know your feelings in your heart.. As i have such feelings too.. I miss you all very much here too… We will be keep in touch and meet each others all the times when we all are free.. It’s really hard to express out our feelings in our heart.. But as long as our heart is in the same line, we can sense what each others feelings.. if there you need someone talk to you, pls don’t call befrienders ya!! Sms me or call others to relieve your sadness, OK? Suet Yheng, don’t be moody with sometimes not worth for it ok? Study hard and strive hard for your dream. I know you and sure you can meet someone better than him Trust me! You seem like fine but i know sure there is a painful and deep scar in your heart.. Hope you will be very tough! ^_^ this smiling face is for you! Remember always keep it in your heart ok? Khee Yap, you seem very well in your life as maybe you are just finished your stressful final exam..May you get high score in the final and achieve your ambition.. Zhe Zheng, you seem like extremely unsatisfied and unhappy with your conditions in your life right now… I don’t know what had happened to you.. But i just wan to give you a piece of my mind here. Actually don’t you think comparing with others is just a very suffering task? Each of us have our own unique.. For example, you have a good leadership but others maybe don’t have..Or you are very well in Poem but others is totally no idea with it!There is a strong sense of honor and justice in yourself.. Do you realize it your own good things that you have? It’s infinitive if you compare to others as it’s will not never end until you leave this world.. Why human just like to add extra stress and burden in his/her life? We are born here not to compare to others but make our life to be happy and meaningful.. Do whatever you think is worth and meaningful for yourself.. Never always care what others think of you as this is your life but not others.. If you don’t like yourself or look down at your self, don’t expect that others will like you and respect you! Do like yourself first before others like you! Teenagers like us always keep on complaining that our parents do not understand us, don’t care of us, are not justice among siblings and didn’t work their best to satisfied your needs… But why don’t we think of others perspective of view and consider their situations? Let start here.. Why don’t we think of how much of things and love we have sacrificed for them? Do we really that understand their feelings too? Do we really do our best in our responsibility as a son/daughter? Can we be very justice and treat everyone nicely? IN our life, what we always worry is mostly just about studies… But for our parents, there is a lot of burden in their life.. They need to be responsible as a wife/husband,daughter/son, mother/father, workers…. i agree that sometimes they are very firm and stubborn in their unreasonable opinion or decisions…we have to know that there is a variety of people in this world so sure all the point of view sure is not that same.. We found out that there is a big gap between our family and us and they really can’t understand what we really think in our mind..Do you know what the main reason of such things happen? Without having conversation , expressing out our feelings in mind, no one will be understand what we really think of.. We must really have a good talk and communicate with our parents often.. Maybe their channel is not really match with ours young channel but at least you let them know what you really think of… This just my opinion.. Hope zHE zheng can understand i try to tell you here.. Leaving from home and stay alone far from home really changed me alot.. I still remember the days i always argue with family.. Now i realized that family is one of those who really will true to us.. Best friends also the one who treat me sincerely and truly through heart to heart.. Thanks god that i know u guys my best friends… I will be very very miss you all here… Take care and i love you all! =) Do miss me too ya..K.yan, yhenG, k.Yap, remember to take out and have a look with the photo we took together.. That night was a very memorable night for us right~photo capturing and watching movie in Jusco..hehe.. Friendship forever! It’s will be eternal in my life…